"You seem surprised by this," a stranger commented on a post I made about a recent situation wherein I was cyberbullied on social media.

Of course, my ego went into immediate defense: Clearly, this commenter did not read the description. If they had, they would have read about how this person claimed to know me personally and proceeded to share personal details that they wouldn't know unless they put some effort into finding that information. The creepiness of that is what concerned me. The fact that someone wanted so badly to affect or provoke me that they exerted time and energy into going to my website and apparently checking my husband's profile on other social media platforms. Because, after lifelong abuse, I know what stalking looks like—and it rightfully scares me.

But then I realized a greater concern—one that is bigger than just me. That is:

When did we became so unfazed by bullying and abuse that it's tolerated and, dare I say, accepted?

Therein lies the problem.

Every single day, we watch people on social media disrespect each other's posts and opinions.

We watch people's egos jab and poke and duke it out until one finally relents.

Others contribute to the chaos here and there, either liking comments to show support for one side or another or throwing in their own clever remarks for a piece of that validation.

In the midst of this, there is someone being destroyed for whatever they said or believe.😔

But does anyone stop and think of that person?

Does anyone stop to consider what that person might be going through?

And does anyone have any respect anymore, for the fact that everyone is entitled to their opinion?

Having a different opinion is not license to attack someone.

However, if that's what social media has become—a platform to diminish, destroy, and demonize those who disagree—then I worry about the future of a society that normalizes anti-social tendencies.

My argument isn't about social media, though. It exists. It's part of the fabric of our current, modern lives. And it doesn't seem to be going anywhere.

My issue is with the way people carelessly use it to intentionally harm others.

However, we can CHOOSE to use it in a way that allows for everyone to share and for everyone to engage safely.

What does this look like?

Prioritize your peace by not reacting to every post or comment. Although this is in direct opposition to the provocative nature of social media, you are under no obligation to actually do so. Reacting invites a chain reaction, and, at some point, you have to prioritize your peace over winning an online argument that means nothing in the scheme of things. Keeping your nervous system in that highly reactive state isn't good for your mental or physical health, anyway. Believe me—I'm living proof.

Respect other's freedom of expression. When someone posts something that offends you, reflect on why you feel the way you feel instead of assuming something about that other person. Other have the right to post what they choose. So, don't make it mean more than what it is. You make not like it. You may not agree with it. But you can still respect their freedom of expression.

Refrain from engaging in anything intentionally hurtful. In other words, don't be a dick.

This all comes down to a basic life principle:

You can't control others. You can only control YOU.

So, choose to be responsible.

Choose to be act with consideration.

Choose to care for yourself and also for others, so that the world can be a better place for all to live.💗

If you find yourself feeling triggered when you see comments or posts on social media, and you are ready to confront the belief driving this pattern, take the FREE Power Shift Diagnostic QUIZ.

But if you're tired of shrinking, defending, overexplaining, or abandoning yourself every time someone pushes back, my POWER UP transformational guide shows you how to rebuild the self-trust to hold your boundary and your identity—even when somebody else doesn't like it.

Change starts the moment you do. So, start today.✨